On my popularity:
(Wearily) “Yeah, so I'm going to get some food, and then I have to go to Barcode, because if I don't show up, I'll get all kinds of calls and text messages: ‘Where the hell are you?’, you know?”“Wow, I wish my whole body could be as in demand as your pinky toe! I couldn't get the hot dog guy to pour hot grease on me if I was freezing!”
(Sheepishly) “I guess I'm complaining about a problem that isn't really a problem, huh?”
“Exactly.”
In which I lay bare my dizzying intellect:
“You keep asking me why you can't pick up girls downtown. I'll tell you why—because instead of actually talking to them, you've spent your whole time here with your phone open text messaging your ex-girlfriend.”“No, no, that's not it.”
On being Thom Tollerson's daughter:
“I love drunk text messaging. Hey! I still have your dad's number. I should drunk text message your dad!”“Do it.”
“Naw, naw, I won't.”
“Go ahead! It wouldn't be the first time he got a drunk dial from someone who has played at 106 West. One time—I can't remember his real name now for the life of me but everyone calls him Pepino—”
“Pepino?”
”—yeah, Pepino from Davisstreet was in here and he said he was going to tell on me; he was going to call up my father and tell him I was out drinking! At a bar! My dad's attitude was basically ‘Eh? What else is new?’”
In which I feel vindicated for my hard stance on drunk driving and refusing to let someone drive last weekend:
“Thank you so much. Seriously.
“You probably saved my life that night.”
In which I am touched, in a weird way:
“I'm a little too drunk.”“I wish you could transfer some of your drunkedness to me; I'm still sober.”
“I could throw up in your mouth!”
“You know what, if I could manage to keep it down, that would probably be effective.”
“We'd be like birds!”
“Yes!”
“And you could be my baby!”
“I'll be your baby anytime, Jackie.”
“Yeah, but you'd be my bird baby.”
On the afterparty and my being in demand:
“So, are you coming with?”(Reluctantly) “Um, sure. Why not.”
“Kick. Ass!” (With accompanying high five).
